Do you know what your core values are? What is it you will fight for? A fight in this sense means stick up for.

Every faith has a tenet that their followers live by. If you are religious do you stick by your faith's creed e.g. The Ten Commandments, The Five Pillars and The Four Noble Truths of Buddhism? Even if you are not religious you should have values that you stick by. What do you believe is right or wrong?

Remember these values are two way. You cannot expect people not to steal from you if you are willing to steal from them or others. This stealing may involve time, conditions or money.

Some of the values to consider are: honesty, truth, trust, patience, tolerance, stealing, and sanctity of life, euthanasia and manners. To help you decide what your core values are decide what you are prepared to stick up for. Would you be prepared to tell your boss you disagree with their decision? Would you be prepared to give up your job if it conflicted with your core values?

You need to make these decisions now and then you will have no trouble dealing with any situations as they arise. It is only when you have to dither about a decision that it can become difficult.

When colleagues know how you feel about your values you will not have problems. If you chop and change your values and have no backbone you will not gain respect from colleagues or bosses.

Having core values increases your self confidence. You know what you believe and how you should behave so there is no personal conflict. Make sure all your actions reflect your beliefs and be consistent. Colleagues, bosses and clients need to know where they stand with you.

It is no good reacting completely the opposite from one day to the next. There will be occasions where there may slight differences and where leniency may be necessary but the reason for this should be part of your core values and therefore not totally unexpected by those you work with.

If you do have slip ups in how you act do not beat yourself up about it. If the situation calls for an apology do so as soon as possible. Do not make a big deal about it or it will appear false but make sure that the person you have slighted knows you are sorry and why.

Learn from the experience and if necessary devise an action plan to develop the skills you lack or are under developed.

Although you are trying to make yourself the best person possible, be very wary of expecting your husband, wife or partner to be perfect. Paragons of virtue do not exist and if you put them on a pedestal they will feel it impossible to live up to your ideals and you will probably wish to terminate your relationship with them.

Remember the reasons why you fell in love with them. We all have foibles and these are what make us the people we are. Concentrate on changing what you can change - yourself and leave others to change themselves.